I love you just so you’re not alone…

I now have an entirely new perception and appreciation for the “older” generation in the current (I hate to use these words, as they are overused, but I couldn’t come up with a better phrase or word) economy. To lose your job after you’ve been there for decades, or lose your profession because it’s no longer “needed” on the budget. There is no greater reminder to age (other than your body falling apart) than trying to learn a new trade, or applying for a job only to be passed up for a kid the same age as your child or even grandchild. During the interviews you are asked very remedial questions, most of which actual catch you off guard because they are so brainless and pointless like “what’s your favorite color”. As if that question will be able to determine if you are capable of running a copy machine or typing a memo. You also have an amazing resume, one that most employers don’t even get past the first page because they don’t understand why you would be applying for a pizza delivery driver job when you got your PHD at UNC. So while you’re sitting there, trying not to feel stupid because the color question threw you off, they throw another one at you “why do you want this job when you obviously are completely overqualified”. How do you answer this one without sounding totally desperate? Because every one of their classmates from high school 3 years ago have just graduated and are willing to take the positions you’re qualified for for a quarter of the salary they think you require. You’re overqualified and it feels like at times you’re speaking a different language, but it’s a rough time for everyone… you’re considering dumbing  down your resume just to get a foot in the door. If you’re lucky enough to get hired, or brave enough to apply to positions outside your expertise, then you get the unique honor of being taught how to do your job by someone decades younger, usually with the style you tried to run away from back in the 60’s and 70’s. Then you start wondering if you sold out. It was hard enough on your self-esteem to look for jobs and be denied by kids, but now you’re starting to doubt yourself and your worth and abilities. You lose sight of the enormous talent that you are, and begin to wonder if you made a huge mistake, if you “sold out”. It’s a vicious cycle, and those with jobs are told they should be incredibly grateful to have one (or more) even if it sucks (most of them do). It’s hard sometimes to get up and be thankful that I get to go be bossed around by people many years younger with alot less experience and making alot more money than me. I do believe though that this job will lead to better things, and the E-word won’t be like this forever. And as tough as it is to feel grateful some days when I wake up and try to shove more information in my brain than I feel capable, trying hard not to feel  like a total idiot, I know there’s alot of people out there that aren’t lucky enough to have any income right now. So for now, I’m going to chose to learn something new from every person responsible for my development in the company and in life, and maybe along the way I’ll teach them something too. Things will look up, and will get better. Someday you will be recognized for your amazing talents and experience. I’m not sure why I wrote this one today, but if for nothing else, to let others in the same situation know that there is a light, no matter how far it may seem, at the end of the tunnel. You alone can hang on to the knowledge that you are worth more, and will have the opportunity to be recognized for it someday. In the meantime, smile because you’ve lived the experiences and made the hard decisions that others haven’t.. and that alone gives you an edge above the rest. Sleep well, I’m thinking of you.

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